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  • ANIYSA RAIFORD

IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME?


“Is something wrong with me?”. It’s a common question that almost everyone has asked themselves before. Therefore if you haven’t then you’re perfect.


In that case, if you have been confident about literally everything in your life, ALL YOUR LIFE, this blog post may not be for you (but still stay and read, pretty please).


I’ve asked that question so many times to myself as I looked at my reflection in the mirror. As I looked at my white patches on my face, my skinny body, and big lips with a few teeth too far out for my liking, I examined everything I didn’t like about myself.


WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME?

I was overlooked for giving out my number in middle school to boys and as I was not chosen for the dances.


Don’t worry I went to my prom though Senior Year! Shoutout Class of 2012!


The little confidence that I did have was always shot, wondered why no one flirted with me or picked me to be their girlfriend till later on in life?


It made me feel ostracized and that everyone decided that it wasn’t cool to like little ole’ me.

That same sentiment unfortunately carried over into college, when I experienced my first (major in my mind) break up with my long term boyfriend.


Thoughts rushed back to me, as I was the insecure girl from middle school where no boys were asking for my phone number, “Is there something wrong me?”.


THEN I REALIZED WHO I WAS.

Even when I was thinking about this some more, and before and honestly even after knowing who Christ is in my life, I was still bothered by this.


Of course, I know my identity in him, and it’s him who deems me beautiful, but you start to think about everything and everyone around you who seems to have someone.


You’re the only one with nobody.


I really used to think that I was a nobody and that something was really wrong with me, that I didn’t have anyone. I figured because I didn’t have a somebody, that what was I worth?


When I really started to become aware of who I was, and finding out what I wanted out of life, then I grew out of what others thought about me and how I thought about others too.


It was others that were missing out on someone special like me, a phenomenal person might I add.

Not to toot my own horn, but I know I’m a valuable, and you should know that you are too!


Once I started to realize my full potential and who I was, I never gave anyone else that power to put me down or make me feel less than.


I started going from “Is something wrong with me, to that’s unfortunate that they will never get to experience someone like me.


It’s all in perspective. I transformed my mind and ultimately my confidence. My focus shifted on those that were appreciating me , then those that weren’t.


LOVE YOURSELF, PERIOD.

So this Valentine’s Day, If you’re feeling like something is wrong with you, I want to tell you that ABSOLUTELY NOTHING is wrong with you!


You are loved by those that are around you and by those that admire you from afar but aren’t able to handle the amount of love that you give.


To tell you the truth, even if you do feel sad and alone, that’s okay too. You want to acknowledge those feelings, and channel them into other interests. Do some self work and make yourself happy.


God’s love for you, and the love of you still being needed here, is why you have so much to offer. You are loved for being you, and that self-love is the best love. If you never get the validation that you seek, know that you love you for YOURSELF.


So Happy Valentine’s Day to those in love, loving others, and of course, loving yourself first!


LET ME KNOW BELOW, HAVE YOU EVER FELT THIS WAY? HAVE YOU EVER BEEN A LATE BLOOMER IN LIFE WHEN IT COMES TO RELATIONSHIPS?



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